GOOD... and bad

Oh, hai.

Yesterday started out so good... and ended so bad(ly)...

Let me explain.
Yesterday morning, I went to church. :) But... I didn't attend a church service. How did I do this? I simply stayed in one place for an hour.

And it was the beeeest hour of mah life. :D

I don't regret it... and I don't think I'll forget it, either.

The only downside was, I didn't know when to go out to the car... when the actual service(s) ended... yeah...

And then, when I got home from youth group last night, I went on this website I had really only been on once before... and suddenly, this message pops up about a malware attack. >:( At first, I thought it was nothing and dismissed it.
Then, a different popup comes, essentially saying I can't leave the page (the threat of "unless you want your PC to crash" tends to unnerve me. :P)... and when I click "cancel," immediately, this thing comes up... to install "antivirus." >:(

Hmmph. Well, I went to Hannah (who was already chatting with me at this point) about it... after a few minutes, she called me and I effectively closed Firefox without having my PC crash. XD

And after a few minutes of the runaround (closing an invisible firefox window... firefox is stupid that way, taking forever to realize it's closed), I opened up Firefox again and closed all the pesky windows that said miscellanous things, mainly relating to computer health... 41 infections or something.

So now I'm kinda nervous about turning on my loaned laptop tonight... is it really infected with 41 viruses and the like?
Who knows.

CZYA

Hmm...

Suddenly...
I felt my eyes
Pouring tears on me of liberty!
And I realized I was one
Who needed love and setting free!
My brother here, my sister there,
And the banquet host, His empty chair!
Forgiveness came, and sweet relief
And then I saw why He invited me
Tonight!
-- PC3, "Banquet Table (Part 3)"

You fall on your knees,
You beg, you plead,
"Can I be somebody else
For all the times I hate myself?"
Your failures devour
Your heart in every hour
You're drowning in your imperfection!
-- Skillet, "Imperfection"

Never reaching what I want to reach,
Never being who I want to be,
Blaming me when I fall and fail,
All my dreams, splintering,
Under my fingernails.
-- Skillet, "Fingernails"

And would I wash my hands again?
Would I deny my Savior when,
He hung Himself in public square?
Did not my silence put Him there?
-- newsboys, "God Is Not A Secret"

You want to, You want to
Soak my heart in gasoline,
Light a match and consume me,
Soak my pride in gasoline,
All of You and none of me.
-- Skillet, "Gasoline"

Sigh,
Let's be blunt.
I'm a little distracted,
What do You want?
Headaches and bad faith
Are all that I've got.
First, I misplaced the ending,
Then I lost the plot.
-- newsboys, "Lost The Plot"

Will you forgive?
Will you forget?
Will you live what you know?
He left His rights,
Will you leave yours?
You don't understand it,
Let it go.
-- newsboys, "Let It Go"

When all is said
And all has come undone
Restore the promise I made
When I was young,
Now unto Him who can keep us from falling,
Present us faultless before His glory, and
...
Breathe, oh Breath of Life,
Breathe on me,
'Til I'm resting in You.
-- newsboys, "Breathe (Benediction)"

Now you're probably wondering why I posted a whole bunch of song lyrics here. Well, because I felt I needed to do so.
It's a long story to be honest. See the lines of the last song I posted... the ones in bold? That sums up what happened to me recently pretty well.

And then my youth leaders swamped Facebook and are making me feel guilty, and as a result, I won't be on Facebook for a while.
I even disconnected my Twitter from my Facebook, so my "tweets" shouldn't update my FB status anymore.

And I did some other things... that I'm not disclosing here... yeah.

So I need prayer. Yes, prayer would be nice. :)
And there's something missing from this post...
There we go. :)

CZYA

The New Year Lock-In

Hai.
In all my excitement for the new year, I totally forgot about telling y'all about this lock-in.
So here we go.

When we first got there, we saw this little dog running around the garden inbetween the second and third buildings (I might get a picture sometime. ;) ). I wasn't sure where she came from, but she must've belonged to someone inside because someone was looking for her.
When I went in, the gym was populated. I quickly put my stuff down and filled Hannah in via text about what was happening, and other things. Then I noticed the same dog and learned it belonged to one of our youth leaders; I later learned her name was Lilo.
First off, Rusty pulled us all together and we started group games. First was sack races. That one, I managed to bruise up my big toe and cause half my left foot to be sore for the rest of the night. The spoon game I was grateful to sit on the sidelines for. But then there was the third game -- the four-legged race. I hated the three-legged race as is, so this one was nearly murder; I'm glad I wasn't in the middle. :P
Then we broke apart for the most part. I went upstairs and watched as the rest of them were having problems setting up Rock Band. :P And once they had finally set up, I was just about anywhere. As this was happening, Rusty was everywhere, prodding people about being in the talent show -- including me. And then he said something that shocked me... "You're a good singer."
Verja, whenever you get back, I think we made a breakthrough. However, I'm wondering why it took him this long to notice.
Anyway, soon we were all relocated to the youth room -- in the middle building -- for the talent show. By this point, I was seriously considering being a part of it, and some of the others were urging me to do it, too.
At around midnight, we went out and celebrated the new year with fireworks. Or, to be more accurate, roman candles. Very fun. During all this, I tugged Rusty aside and asked him if it was too late and he said no -- which was good. Of course, we ran out of time and I never got the chance. It hurt, but I did get over it.
When we got back, we ate -- mainly lasagna and hot dogs, both of which I hate. So I had to deal with an empty stomach for a little bit, but I didn't really care.
Then we went back into the youth room for a dance-off. However, I didn't participate. Why? Because Hannah was testing her cellphones, and I answered the first test call. :D It was tough to hear her through most of it, because they were pumping the music pretty loud -- and some of the others were trying to get Lilo to do some tricks nearby; quite loudly, I might add. But it was great.
We talked until the building got eerily silent, and I realized they had went back into the other building. So I hung up and went back as well; after telling Hannah via text that the second call came through, they started the group games. First was an awesome that I think was called "Undercover Christian." 'Twas awesome.
The game involves four "cops." Each one was given a slip of paper -- three say "cop," and one says "undercover Christian." The rest of the people are Christians. It was completeleh dark and we had to find a spot to hide in until the undercover Christan invites us to the "church," a random room in the building. But if we get caught by the cops, we had to go to another random room, deemed as the "jail." We couldn't get out of jail until another Christian came and got us. When all the Christians are in jail, they lose -- if they're all in church, they win.
I had an awesome hiding place that was not discovered at all. :) I was quite proud of myself when I wasn't discovered by two "cops" that came in... >:) but that also meant I knew nothing of where the church was, the status of the other Christians, etc. But one thing where I did have an advantage -- I was one room away from where the jail room was. >:D The Christians that were captured were lamenting about how the others were all already in church. They sent the cops down there to see -- that was my chance. Once the last cop left, I sprinted out and caused a jailbreak. :D :D :D
Sure, I got captured, but we quickly got out and went to the church.... the girl's bathroom. :O Yeah, awkward.
Then we played Sardines. I HATE SARDINES. 'Twas too dark! >:(
Then they played the cop game again -- I was starting to get sleepy, so I stayed in the gym and took photos. :P :P
And THEN we played a game involving running around in a big ol' circle and people were starting to drop like flies. That was when we went into groups of girls and guys -- guys went into the youth room, we went into the nursery.
We had fun in there. We played a little game called "Chubby Bunny." That involves stuffing your face with marshmallows and trying to say the phrase "chubby bunny." Everyone was laughing. Then they played "telephone..." a little game that involves whispering a phrase into a neighbor's ear and seeing how it contorts itself. XD
Then they were playing around and I started nodding off for a few seconds every so often. Then we got ambushed. By the guys. With Silly String. O.O That stuff smells terrible; and there was a lot of it at this lock-in. The rest of the time involved cleaning up and leaving. :( Booie.

'Twas great, all in all. And this be a long, long post. I should find a way to reward you, should you read it all. :)

CZYA

Figgy Pudding

The title is what Rusty is calling himself now. XD
That's his so-called "rapper name." Strange, he sounds like tobyMac. XD

So now we (we, as in Soul Skittles, netsirK, Verja and anyone else who would like to join in) must all refer to him as Figgy Pudding.
Then laugh. Hard.

Well, I got an opinion on Dude from Rusty.
In case you didn't know, Dude is having battery problems -- he won't work unless he's on his charger.
But Rusty didn't bother to hear the whole story, so he think's it's the Kiwi power cord. Extremely unlikely, if you ask me.

Now I'm being rushed off. >:( Hateful.

CZYA

TAHHGED

I's been tagged again. :D I love these. :D
15 RANDOM THINGS YOU'RE NOT ASHAMED TO SHOUT TO THE WORLD

1. I am a Christian. Obviously.
"You say that you believe it, then live it, and walk it, and breathe it, and talk it, and dream it, recieve it." -- Paul Colman Trio, "Live It!"

2. I am a walking encyclopedia of newsboys information. Most of you already know this, but it's gotta be said. If you want a complete walkthrough of Peter's life, I'll recite it out to you all the way! Hopefully, this won't come back to bite me when I meet him.

3. I can't stand Casting Crowns. Thousands of apologies to Soul Skittles and Rusty, but really, we can live without hearing another CC radio single! I can't stand coming into my mother's car, or into youth group, for that matter, and hearing a song by them. It gets old!

4. I LOVE rap and hard rock. Many apologies to Verja and Guitargirl here. I get this from my mother -- I LOVE rap music, but secular rap hoovers, let's face it. Thank goodness we have Christian rappers (as well as Christian hard rockers) out there! Go FF5! Go tMac! Go Skillet! :D :D :D

5. I'm extremely shy and reserved in real life. Be glad you know me here, cuz if I met anyone of you in real life on the street before any of this happened, I wouldn't pay attention.

6. I love the evening and the pitch of night. I brought this up with Jess last night. I HATE Daylight Savings Time, and LOVE night. Especially if there's a full moon out. :D

7. I have a LOT in common with Peter! I'm serious here! One thing is that we're dog lovers... and here's the semi-creepy coincidence -- We both have two dogs. The older one for both sides is male and they're both kinda up there in age (Peter's is older, though), and the younger is female. And to finish off the coincidence, my dogs are both Chihuahua mixes and Peter's are both Poodle mixes (I believe). Yeah, it's weird, I know! We're both born in September (24 hours apart! *squee*), we love to read, we enjoy music (OBVIOUSLY!!!)... there are more things, but I can't think of 'em.

8. I love TV Classics. Dang, TV just got worse with age! The best shows are shows that have LONG been canceled or finished running. Shows like M*A*S*H, I Love Lucy, Hogan's Heroes, Full House... I could go on.

9. For the most part, my youth group is infuriating. Luckily, no one from there reads this blog. XD But really! They don't agree with anything that I enjoy! They shun the nb as if they were yesterday's news! >:( That doesn't fly, at ALL. And then they passively shun me from whatever they're doing -- which is why I hate socializing hour there.

10. I HATE Halloween. And yet we celebrated it anyway this year because my sister gets everything she wants. >:( It's waaaay to pagan for any Christian in their right mind to celebrate.

11. I dislike the pagan side of Christmas. Shunning aside all that Christmas originally stood for, the pagan mates came up with the traditions of trees, Santa (though I do LOVE Inflatable Santa. :D). And they even came up with pagan songs like "Jingle Bells" and "Santa Claus is Coming to Town." When will it end?? Don't write xmas. Put CHRIST back in CHRISTmas.

12. Adoration has to be the BEST Christmas song EVER. I love it! Sparrow Records was a fool not to have accepted it as such!

13. Just as I love rap and hard rock, I also love soft worship songs. Hey, I told you I'm all over the place! The late Rich Mullins, Jars of Clay, Caedmon's Call, Brandon Heath, Phil Wickham... I could definitely go on.

14. I can't think of anymore. XD

Darnit, all the peoplez have already been tagged. :( Oh, well.

CZYA

Well...

Stupido Myspace, not loading the "Radiator" video. X( Evil.
Once it decides to cooperate, I shall make more screenshots.

But until then, I has stuff to say.

Some of y'all remember my friend Sara. Well, her brothers got baptized last Sunday. :D It made me cry, thinking of their big sister; I bet she's still proud of them.
Now, I know netsirK and Jess know about it, Hannah knows to some extent, and I told Verja about it over chat.
But what about Ms Soul Skittles? Have I told you about Sara?

Well, for her and the rest who don't know, let me explain.

Sara was a normal girl... who became a close friend of mine back when nearly every kid my age avoided me like the PLAGUE. >:( We were inseperable for about a year. Sweet, sweet girl, even when we started drifting apart.

And yes, we drifted apart. But I still loved her.
And I was heartbroken when I first received the dreaded news. That Sara had a brain tumor. An inoperable brain tumor. A rare brain tumor that no one had ever survived before.

At first, she seemed no different. She just suffered from the occasional painful headache and that was it.
But she slowly started getting worse; it was especially apparent at the beginning of 2008. She began to lose her ability to keep her balance while standing, her headaches got worse and she developed double vision.
She ended up in a wheelchair and received glasses. And her face... well, let's just say every time I laid eyes on her face like it was, it seemed to scream that Sara was a shadow of her former self, and it made me somewhat miserable. This was what my dear friend had become? It made me feel horrible. Like I wanted to take her place.

The last I ever saw of her was on June 1, a Sunday. We were having a little party and she was joining in. :)
After that, I never saw her again. Apparently, she was getting worse and worse. And since she wanted to start coming to Sunday School again, we moved our service downstairs to the gymnasium, since the 2nd floor had only one way up, and it was stairs. We did this twice.

I heard one Tuesday after the 2nd Sunday we pulled this that Sara was rushed to the ER, unresponsive. I was fearing the worst already.
Then the next day came along. It started out normally, going to youth group and all. But then we were called to pray for Sara, and I went in. Our associate pastor gave us the news. Sara had died earlier that day.

I won't lie; I was crying within at least two seconds of the news. Her life was complete, now she was gone. It truly made me miserable; but to my surprise, Rusty actually came up and hugged me while I was mourning her. :)

A couple days later, I emailed her parents and told them how much of a blessing she was in my life; her funeral services came and it was... almost surreal.
I remember her father came in to our little circle and addressed us. How he called me out and thanked me for the email I sent. And my reply... that it was the least I could do.

All through that part of the procession (I don't remember what it's called!), I kept this one song in my head (I'll say in a minute) as I came to see Sara's body. I had kept my head until I saw her; I'm so glad I barely remember what she looked like there. :P I decided not to stay for the rest of the ceremony and we left.
But I'll never forget what Sara did for me. :)

And for the song...
It's by Phil Joel. It's a very touching song known as "Passing Angel." EXTREMELY beautiful, and even when I first heard it, it struck me as being perfect for a funeral. :P
There are only two verses to speak of, just repeated. And it stresses the beauty of the song. :)

We won't say goodbye.
This is not the end, we know.
Truly all who live must die.
But not all who live have truly been alive.

So I will celebrate your life.
Celebrate your faith.
Celebrate your love,
And the legacy you leave.

It fit Sara so perfectly... :) She was a special soul and certainly won't be forgotten.

November 29, 1993 -- July 2, 2008.
Truly all who live must die... but not all who live have truly been alive.

My dear Sara, I can't wait to see you again in Heaven. :)

And with that, I end. *bows*

CZYA

Today!

Oh. Hai there.

Today was interesting.
I had a headache most of the morning. The crying I did didn't help, either (don't worry -- they wuz happy tears. :D :D).
I couldn't stop coughing at some points, and THAT is annoying. It made me mad. But it was fine.

Youth Group? Oh, that was great. We pelted Rusty with paper balls! XD XD XD CJ chased after people with a pole! XD XD XD
Dude, it was great. :) I wanna pelt Rusty with more paper balls! XD Verja, you wanna join me? XD

Alright. Now I have yet another vid for you. YOU MUST VIEW IT! XD Unless you can't. And Verja, you don't have to. ;)



CZYA

O... G... C...

Mates, you won't believe what I saw this morning.

So, I went to church, right? And I sat there, in my usual spot, minding my own business... suddenly, Rusty walks in, and I get the shock of my life.

HE'S DRESSED UP!

This man is NEVER dressed up! But today, he was!! It was almost creepy! He's always so casual. Cargo shorts, t-shirt, and flip-flops. TODAY, he wore a buttoned shirt, LONG pants... and I didn't get a glimpse of his shoes, but I'm sure they weren't flip-flops!
It was shocking. I did not expect that. (nb references! XD XD)

Hmm... something interesting...

For Kris -- I have a vid for you when you get back on the Intranet:



And this, too:



And my other bloggy peeps... I have this:



CZYA

Gah. I be tagged.

1. List 10 things you are thankful for
Jesus
Friends
newsboys
doggies
my youth group
Rusteh (even when he's a jerk. :P)
Music
Being a certified weirdo (XD)
Church
All the material stuffs I has.


2. Arrange these 9 colours into favouritest to least favouritest.
Black
Red
Blue
Purple
Green
White
Yellow
Orange
Pink


3. Name 8 things that bug you
Obama
smoking
Kids that smell like they've been smoking (UGH!)
Rusty and CJ (in jerky mode)
"Ticking time bomb" people (aka people with short tempers/patience)
The bad name given to me of Casting Crowns by radio stations and my youth leaders (tell me otherwise, O Tacogirl)
High School Musical
Alcohol


4. Pick 7 songs that describe each day of your week (and explain if ya can)
Monday - Sweet River; Paul Colman (Sweet river of love/Come save me... need I explain more?)
Tuesday - Reality; newsboys (Probably the realization that Monday has passed. :P)
Wednesday - We Come Together; newsboys (Youth Group. 'Nuff said)
Thursday - Hallelujah; newsboys (Wednesday has passed, looking forward to Friday)
Friday - It's Joy; newsboys (OLD newsboys song that rocks my socks. XD)
Saturday - Isaiah; newsboys (What? Saturday rocks, so does this song!)
Sunday - Sunday; Tree63 (the title says it all. So does the chorus)

5. List 6 people your age or younger that are your best friends
FriHo (one of my cousins, who's a couple years younger than I)
Tacogirl
Verja
Netsirk
QuiJu (one of my school friends; she rocks)
MarCo (XD Gotta love the way his star wars name turned out) another one of my school friends.

6. List 5 of your favourite foods
Pizza
Tacos
Pasta drenched in pizza sauce (don't ask. XD)
Grilled Cheese
Pretzels

7. List 4 older people you really like (besides your parents) (oh and by the way they can be dead people if you want em to be)
Rusty
Furpe (Guess who? XD)
Phurry (*wink wink*)
JamJo (take a wild guess)

8. List 3 people you've never met before that you want to meet
Tacogirl
Furpe
Netsirk

9. List 2 places you've never got to that you want to go to
Aussie
Israel

10. Name the one most important thing in your life
My God, my Father, my Savior (thank goodness they all mean the same Person! *wink*)


RULES
Erase my answers and put in your own
List the rules
Link to the person that tagged you
Tag as many other people as you want
And POST IT!

PERSON THAT TAGGED ME - This Girl I Call TACOGAL
I can't tag any peeps new.
Maybe Owan, perhaps. ;)

CZYA

SUNDAY! HALLELUJAH!

Hai, people of... something or other.

Today, I went to church. Yeah. I sure did. :P

Now if y'all remember what happened the Wednesday before last, you'd understand (at least somewhat) why the following event happened:

It was the time of the service to walk around aimlessly and talk to people. I was HONESTLY minding my own business, when CJ comes up to me and nudges my upper arm. "Hey," he says, "How are ya?" I reply "Good," but inside, I was unnerved at the fact that he STOOD there next to me, not making ANY effort to move. And the rest of the congregation was singing. Yeah, you can see my distress. I didn't want to sing. Even remembering what Verja told me didn't help. >:( I was so relieved when he finally moved away.

So, yeah. Had to get that offa my chest.

CZYA

Ok, I'll bite.

Okay... I guess I'm ready to share with y'all what caused me such distress at youth group.

I warn you. It won't seem like something to be worked up about to you... but this... just sucked ALL the passion, the love I had for singing. And it really had me upset.

So... it was the end of youth group. Rusty's buddy CJ sat down next to me, and proposed, of all things, singing lessons. Ughh!
He briefed me of the procedure. I didn't like it, but I wasn't about to show it. I sat there silently, giving absentminded nods every so often to tell him I was listening. I kept fighting the urge to run outside and cry uncontrollably.

Now, I have ALWAYS hated the guts of singing lessons; I'm a firm believer that true talent comes naturally. In nearly every situation. So I avoid even the mere thought of singing lessons like the Plague. Actually, I'd rather HAVE the Plague than be told my vocals hoover. It took YEARS for ANY singing talent to appear within me at ALL!

And I don't think that's the whole reason why I was crying my eyes out when I got home. I think what wounded and offended me most was when CJ said that not everyone can sing.

NOW I KNOW FOR SURE THAT BOTH HE AND RUSTY THINK I CAN'T SING.
AND WHAT'S WORSE, THEY'RE PROFESSIONALS, SO IT'S HARDER FOR ME TO IGNORE IT!

It was a MAJOR blow. I was extremely depressed when I got home. When everyone had gone to bed and I tried to, I found myself crying endlessly. It really hurt. One of the BEST ways to make me cry is to tell me I can't sing.
My vocals are one of my VERY few claims to fame amongst all who know me. Anyone who tells me that I have no singing voice obviously either knows nothing about me or knows me full well, but doesn't love me at all.

The next morning was worse. I was listening to "Catchafire" and crying. And I don't usually cry during a song like "Catchafire." Who would?
"Isaiah" helped me through it greatly. A beautiful song telling me to give glory to God no matter what. And so I did, so I shall.

END RANT.

REQUESTING ASSISTANCE, PLEASE

Hai, peeps.
Today, I have a mission for you to help me out with.

See, I have to find 5 songs for one of my youth group leaders (not Rusty. ;)) for Sunday night's youth meeting that have to do with WORSHIP.
I'd appreciate some suggestions to pass on to him. Remember, at least FIVE. If it were any other message (ie, idolatry or love, etc.), I would need slightly less help.
I'd GREATLY appreciate it if you'd help me out. I need them by tomorrow at least. Your help will be rewarded. Eventually. :P

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.

CZYA

:P :P

Oh, hai.
Like I said, I apologize for my OWN slip in blogging. Booo!

Anyway.
HOORAY! All of you guessed correctly. Solomon Olds = Soul Glow Activatur, of... FF5. XD

Soul Glow helped write it, he did programming, keys, bass, electric guitar, beats (:P), and background vocals!! I've been trying hard to hear him in "Catchafire." Maybe he's responsible for the beat at the beginning and near the middle. Sounds like they're saying "dum-dum." XD XD It's hilarious.


Ehhh... something happened last night. At youth group.
I don't really wanna talk about it (I'm JUST getting over it), but I will give away a couple aftereffects of the incident: I was BARELY able to stop crying between when I got home from youth last night and this morning before I got on the bus this morning. It was made worse with nearly every song I heard within that time. I will say only those two details.
Yeah, I call it bad. Very bad.

I think my Newsgirl shirt is bad luck. :P

CZYA

Youth Group...!

Okay, good news/bad news for me, too.

Bad news: 'Member that Mac battery? It's a battery CHARGER. Humph! Now I'm gonna have to wait longer to get Helmet up. Booo.
Good news: Unlike poor netsirK, my youth group went pretty well. Usually, it's like her youth group last night, falling apart.
But not tonight... God is good!

Let me explain...

First off, if you either don't know or don't remember, my mother drives a school bus for a living. Yesterday, she was dropping off a bunch of middle school kids (whom had been giving her problems), and one of their mothers sat waiting. Long story short, the confrontation didn't end well. I screened out the last few minutes, but I knew it didn't end well.

Especially after she got home. She thought I wasn't going to youth group, but I had changed my mind after I had to get off the bus early... with my little sister... against my will. So she asked me to feed the dogs. I reacted negatively, and Ma decided to scream at me. Por que? It NEVER settles well with me.
Once again, I came to youth in tears. Now Rusty has turned into an emotion detector (XD :P), and compensates for it with a sensitive side. Yeah, that's the THIRD time he's been sensitive! I feel kinda proud of myself. :P
He gave me such a TIGHT hug... I will never forget this. It impacted me more than he knows.

Well, back to what happened.
Rusty has a relatively new Mac of his own (POR QUE?!?!?!), and we had to take our photo using it (I haven't yet... SHH! It's a secret!). But that was a sideline.
One of our youth has a girlfriend. Diagnosed with cancer. It hits a softer spot with me now... because of Sara. So anyway, we prayed for him, then we went outside.

We played quite a bit of games.
First was a strange game where we made what the leaders called a "cheerio" and we had to keep this big, red ball moving around inside the cheerio. A person would get tapped, and they had to run around the cheerio, back to their space, without the red ball hitting them. Hey, I succeeded!
Next, we got into a big circle, hooking our arms with a partner. Around the outside of said circle, one guy chases another, and the second guy can hook arms with someone in the circle. Their partner is forced to run. That was pretty fun, too.
Next one was weird... I'll explain it later.
The next one was Capture the Flag. Oh, dude, that was GREAT. SO much better than the lock-in's CTF. Anyway, since it was dark out, we made use of that advantage. First game, we won because the other team went all-out, while we inflitrated their base from the sides. Haha. Then we switched bases and hid our flag in a pretty good place. And the other team thought they won. They grabbed a teammate's shirt! XD

Anyway... it was fun! Something that doesn't happen very often.

CZYA

PS --
Check the previous post again... ;)

Youth Group!

I went to Youth Group. Again. Ah, it was great.

Rusty (about another youth): "Yeah, she likes to hide from me."
Me: "Don't we all."
He proceeded to give me a strange look, and I burst into laughter. Yeah, it was great.

Then, I felt kinda left out again, so I exited, sat in my favorite spot, and listened to Peter's Testimony from Houston, and part of it from Milwaukee... man, the thing about Congress was pretty funny, even though it wasn't meant to be. :P :P

Then we went inside and ate a cookie cake. Cookie cakes are the best cakes ever! XD

And I'm currently hooked on this song:



:D :D :D

CZYA

The Man named Rusty -- Part Deux

Hi, peeps.
'Member this??
My blog about Rusty?
Well, hold on to... WHATEVER you want to hold onto.
Cuz I'm about to add on some MORE things you need to know about this dude.
Ready??
Here goes...

• He loves hats about as much as Peter does, and it tends to cover up his hair... which is black, curly, and looks kinda like a mullet. I often joke that he does have a mullet, and he's always like, "I do NOT have a mullet!!"
  Which makes it so much funnier. :D
• Ludicrous will LOVE this -- he is a HUGE fan of Casting Crowns and CONSTANTLY edges something about them in EVERY youth group service... which tends to drive me up a wall.
• Rusty is EXTREMELY stubborn -- it took SIX years of poking and prodding from my pastor and his family for him to finally become a Christian.

And I think that be it for now. I wanted to go ahead and get that off my chest. :P

CZYA

WOOHOOOOOOO!

...And the people sing!
XD

Well, I'm back from that lock-in I told you mates about...

AND I HAD A BLAST!!

I'm looking forward to doing something like that in the not-so-distant future. That rocked. Out loud. Much like the fact that my birthday is directly AFTER Peter's. XD Anyways.

I came up there around five to seven PM. And therefore, I was the first kid there. :) Then again,
I prefer being early to being late, so it's not unusual. As the next two hours passed, people began flooding in, and it was getting to be a packed house. Which is the best thing ever.
Later on, the girls were edged out to the second building (remember: our church has three buildings... we were using the last two.). We went down to the Youth Room and settled in there. Then, little by little, we all went back into the third building. I, being the group loner, stayed back as long as I could get away with, listening to live "Shine" and "Secret Kingdom" in there.
And we waited for our food, which was being grilled. :D And I was walkin' around in boredom (it's just SO easy for me to be bored. I need a challenge to keep me entertained. Or something completely hilarious), and I noticed one of the other girls, Anna (that's not her real name), sitting on the edge of the stairwell. One of the two wheelchairs which were out had ran over her toe. She asked me to accompany her back to the Youth Room, and I more than happily obliged. We sat there for a few minutes before Rusty's best friend CJ (trust me, he's not much of an improvement over Rusty) came to see why we were in there in the first place. So Anna showed him her middle toe, which had become very red and somewhat swollen at this point.
He urged the both of us (and a certain boy, whose name I won't reveal as of yet, who had followed us in the room) back to the third building, and by this time, the food was ready. I wasn't really all that hungry, so I didn't eat much at all.
When everyone was done, Rusty gathered us up for wheelchair races. That was pretty uneventful. I mean, WHEELCHAIRS!! Anyways. Rusty managed to get us scattered to play the random games. Which included a Wii, an Xbox 360, a ping-pong table, karaoke and board games (which was Rusty's idea, ironically). I went to the Wii room, and watched four other kids play bowling. Dang, it was cool. I didn't want to try then, so I walked off.
Between then (around... 11:30 or something like that) and 1:45 AM, we were all playing in the random rooms. The 360 was mainly being used for Rock Band, and it was pretty loud. And annoying. Long story short, I eventually went to try the Wii, and I loved it. Perhaps I should ask for one soon. And sell my Gamecube.
So, around 1:45, Rusty decided to gather us all up to play group games. First was Capture the Flag. Which was was totally confusing, and worse because there's little room to navigate, it's dark, and everyone loved to talk during the instructions. It was all too much to my already fatigued brain. So during the next game, Sardines, I sat out tiredly with CJ and one of the other girl's mothers.
And by 3:30, I was given the gracious chance to get to bed... I was the first one to crack. But apparently, my 3 hour sleep was the best out of the others. I woke back up around 6:30. I spent one last hour there before I finally went home.
And THAT, my friends, is what happened at last night's lock-in. Right after, when I got home at 7:30, I slept until 1:30. I needed it. So... yes, it was a blast! I can't wait to do one like this again.

CZYA

The man named Rusty

Nonohoicha asked in my last comment who Rusty was. Well, first thing's first...

THAT'S A GREAT QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, boy, netsirK knows... I could go all NIGHT talking about this dude.
He's my youth leader.
The man is an enigma, frankly. It's VERY tough to understand him unless you're whole personality is centered around sarcasm.
The main things you need to know about Rusty:

• His real name is Rustin. (netsirK laughed at that. But it's true!) Talk about a unique name.
• He kinda looks like your typical surfer dude: t-shirts, visor caps, cargo pants, flip-flops. That's Rusty for you.
• He is a HUGE fan of the NC Tar Heels. Like my mom. *eyes roll*
• He is VERY sarcastic. And it adds to his somewhat-hilarious personality.
• When it comes to the nb, he could care less. We often clash on that issue.
• He's a computer and music geek. He runs a computer business, and last I heard, he was offered a job at a music store. His dream. *eyes roll*
• He's an Air Force brat. He's been around, definitely (like you, Nonohoicha!).

And man, he annoys me pretty well. But as far as I know, he likes it that way. He's shown me a sensitive side TWICE to date...

• Once was when my friend Sara died.
• The other is documented here.

And that is everything I know so far about the man I know as...

Wait for it...

RUSTIN SMITH!

CZYA

RANT TIME!!

Okies... feel free to ignore this; it wouldn't hurt my feelings. Right now, I'm just venting. I'm so mad.

My time at youth group could've been a lot better. But I'm convinced I had this coming, anyway...

Our youth group begins around 6:30 now, which is a step up from the original 7:00 start time. That fact is where ALL the trouble began...
I wanted my grandparents to take me at 6 sharp, but they claimed that it was too early for them to get ready. I, naturally, got angry and seriously considered not going. In fact, minutes before I had to go, I had my mind set on not going, but my mom yelling at me... it was too much for me to take, so I went.

For the first few minutes, I was completely miserable. Somehow, I knew I was gonna regret coming in the first place. And in the long run, I did. But more about that later.

The only highlight of tonight's session was when Rusty noticed me when I finally came in (after a couple minutes of awkward loneliness), and asked me what was wrong. The trigger was pulled; I started tearing up again.
Rusty, after a couple seconds, led me back outside, and he tried to get something out of me... which never works with me. Then, the best part... all this pent-up emotion actually wrung out Rusty's sensitive side (which I had only seen once before; when I learned that my friend Sara had died), and I seized the opportunity to get a nice, long hug with that mate... that's all I really wanted. There!! I said it! That's one for the history books. I'm never saying that again, so savor the moment.

And after our prayer time, it went downhill from there... I was left feeling like I wasn't an asset to the group... which is not unusual at all. But that's my own fault... old habits die hard. Old habits of being shy, reserved, prefering to be in a secluded spot with something to keep me distracted... yeah.
And do they do anything? No. They barely awknowledge that I exist.

Which is why I'm on the internet so often. I have friends here that value me. I don't feel like an awkward fool (though I do think I'm turning into a jerk...), I'm not pushed away and ignored. Very thankful to have my internet friends... they actually have a little something called EMPATHY and SYMPATHY. It does good things to the outcast. People tend to think that outcasts don't need sympathy and empathy. THEY DO.
I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired of my youth group... but more importantly, I'm sick and tired of myself... for not doing anything about it.

End Rant.

Ok, since I'm once again bored out of my brain, I dug in my dad's laptop's hard drive and found this. One my favorite captioned photos. Is it funny? I don't have a clue. You peeps tell me.

But anyway... that wasn't why I was gonna blog... oh, here's something...

I went to church today (der)... these two girls came in to my Sunday School class (if I'm a perky gal, they're overly perky... it's kinda strange to think about it. O_o). These two were the same girls I sang the newsboys song "Who?" to just last Sunday. Unlike my youth leader (I don't know what's wrong with ol' Rusty...), who I'm fairly sure has something against me singing, they really liked my vocals. I was somewhat impressed, and quite happy with their response. And although Rusty may make me mad by silencing me when I desperately want to sing, I still love him... O hyper one that he is.

So anyways, this week, I was listening to the Paul Colman Trio's "The Killing Tree," and although I did want to sing again, I didn't get the chance to. But I got over it soon enough. Especially when everyone started flooding in. And it got pretty out-of-control very quickly... with one of the two girls, whom I shall call by her nickname, "Nanner," started going after one of the boys in there, and kept saying they were boyfriend/girlfriend. But luckily, Rusty arrived to save the day; and I said, "It's that guy! Whoever he is!" He laughed it off and I gave him the first of many, many hugs today.

So eventually, our Sunday School teacher, Malcolm, arrived and Rusty left. As he did, I said, "Sure! Go ahead and leave, why don'tcha!"

We started going through our lesson, with very frequent interruptions from "Nanner," which poor Malcolm was trying his best to ignore, but one does not ignore a teenage girl who keeps leaping at a boy, calling him her boyfriend, nor do they ignore when she shouts out at random times. Last time "Nanner" decided to go... loopy... Malcolm left us with a speech, which is NOT the norm of Malcolm Britt.

But today, when "Nanner" sat on the floor, she and Malcolm switched chairs, and just so you get an idea of what our classroom is like... Malcom has a table, we don't.

Anyway, as Malcolm finished up the lesson, "Nanner" took an eyeliner wand and started decorating one of the Sunday School books, and Malcolm didn't take it very well.

And that, pretty much, was my Sunday School class today.

Now, on to what happened earlier this evening...

I retreated outside, like I usually do, and sat on a concrete uprising, which was connected to our third building by a little "bay" of sorts, which used to house our church vans (where they went, I haven't a clue). I sat there and turned on my iPod, which is in a little speaker system/dock... it rocks. There, I sat and listened to Paul Colman Trio songs contentedly, until I decided to come back inside. And a few more minutes after I came in, Rusty arrived.

We ended up watching this video we were familiar with... the Lifehouse "Everything" performance seen on YouTube and GodTube... the live version. We had to watch it again because we're planning on re-enacting all this. And Rusty was trying to pull it all together... in their planned two weeks. Yippee.

And after another excellent sermon from our pastor, we were dismissed while the rest of the congregation had a business meeting. Which meant that we could have some fun.

I retreated to my place outside once again, and managed to pour my heart out singing "The Killing Tree" a couple of times, then singing "Fill My Cup." But when I came to "Turn," the whole group was beginning to migrate outside. So much for any more of that. But I tried to save the situation by sprinting all the way across the back field of our church (which is delightfully huge), flipping to a newsboys song: "Something Beautiful."

But that hiding spot got overrun as well, and so I started heading back to my original spot, only to grow tired and flop onto the grass. When Rusty came by, after trying to find a dodgeball for my restless mates, I told him, "Don't mind me... I'm just catching my breath."

I sat there in the grass for a little while, listening to "Shine" live, "Strangely Normal," and "Taste and See." Then, I got up and went inside the dark, deserted third building.

There, I got some water and ended up dancing to the intro of the remixed "Rescue," and sprinted the length of the building. After that, I went to the next song on my iPod, "Resolution." I backtracked in another sprint, and happily danced to that song in the gymnasium. I was tired after all that, and I sat down at one of the tables set up there, and played a favorite of mine: "Unified." But I cut it short and headed for "Bleed," a song I usually turn to when I'm feeling down.

But I had hatched a thought in my head, and I ascended the flight of stairs, flipping to a song on the same newsboys album as "Taste and See," called "Stay With Me." It's a very beautiful song, in my opinion, but I couldn't listen to it without feeling restless and unnerved in the dark, otherwise silent building. So I eventually left and to make the ending short, my time of fun had come to an end. At least I got to listen to my iPod some.

And that was my day. I'm glad someone took the time to sit and listen to me rant. Good day to you. *gets up and leaves*

CZYA