Crazy Warnings

Hai.

Today, I remembered a funny page. A VERY funny page. On the internet. It has all these crazy and strange warnings that they put on stuff. Almost as if they mistranslated English into English. :P
Here, I'll show you some:

Box of bottle rockets
Do not put in mouth.

Small print from a car commercial which shows a vehicle "body-surfing" at a concert
Always drive on roads. Not on people.

One of my faves:
Instructions on the packaging for a muffin at a 7-11
Remove wrapper, open mouth, insert muffin, eat.

Car Manual
In order to get out of car, open door, get out, lock doors, and then close doors.

Stickers to put on the seat of a potty training toilet
This is not a toy. Stickers require adult supervision.

Lawnmower
Warning: When Motor Is Running - The Blade Is Turning

Bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle
Do not open here.

Container of salt
Warning: High in sodium

Mattress
Warning: Do not attempt to swallow

RCA Television Remote Control
Not Dishwasher Safe

Slush Puppy Cup
This ice may be cold

American Airlines Peanuts
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.

Heinz Ketchup
Instructions: Put on food

Chainsaw
Do not attempt to stop chain with hands.

Korean kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children
(I think this one might have been messed-up in translation... XD)

Helmet mounted mirror used by us cyclists:
Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you

Blanket from Taiwan:
not to be used as protection from a tornado

Disposable razor:
Do not use this product during an earthquake.

Bottle of shampoo for dogs
Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish.

Toner cartridge for a laser printer
Do not eat toner.

Silly Putty
Do not use as ear plugs.

Knife sharpening stone
Warning: knives are sharp!

Dashboard of a mail truck
Look before driving.

Children's cough medicine
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

Sign at a railroad station
Beware! To touch these wires is instant death.
Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.

Manual for an SGI computer.
Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers.

Wrapper of a Fruit Roll-Up snack
Remove plastic before eating.

Oh, it was so hilarous. :D :D There are more HERE.

CZYA